No Thinker to Think, No Doer to Do

I try to learn something every day. The subjects vary from the natural environment, to diet, exercise, and health from ancient and modern perspectives, to human behavior and the mechanics of habit and addiction, to sleep, dreams, and memory, and to other things seemingly related or unrelated that suggest themselves along the way, and which seem to shed light on this existence. That this does little to allay my general ignorance is amusing, and something I take in stride. That I am never bored is, perhaps, a good sign; it might also be an indication of gathering senility. I seek no result. I would simply prefer to live and die learning than in a hardened state of absolute certainty. There are times, too, when all I do is sit and breathe, when there is no thinker to think and no doer to do. And though I can offer no proof, I suspect that it is during those sublime absences when I am at my wisest and best. I should add that I maintain no sense of discipline in any of this. In essence I am only doing what I have always done, since childhood. My days are too full to strive for accomplishment or to worry about having a sense of worth. My religion is life. My philosophy is love. I have no politics. I am not right. I am not wrong. I am not enlightened. I am not infallible. I am perfect as I am, until I am perfect in another way. And I will be perfect when I am unremembered and dead.

October 14, 2021

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