Kangai

It might be coincidence, and probably is; on the other hand, why would I have awakened from a dream this morning in which I was repeating the Japanese word kangai, of all things, when I, to the best of my memory and knowledge, have never encountered the word? “Strong feelings; deep emotion,” one definition says, which is mingled with a sense of “nostalgia or contemplation.” And now I look at the drawing and poem under consideration, Canvas 480 and “Night in bloom,” and find that both, taken together, seem apt expressions of this mood. But, as I say, it’s likely coincidence. Also, without doubt, there is much more to kangai than I am aware of. Words have histories; there are whole languages and cultures behind them. Nevertheless, I felt the dream — a mere fragment, really, in which also appeared a patient woman of Japanese descent — worth noting here. Kangai, she said, surprised I was using the word. She was about forty-five years of age. Who is she? I wonder.

[ 2003 ]